“Dreams don’t have timelines, deadlines, and aren’t always in straight lines.”― Jason Reynolds
I never know which question I pose at my Soul Shift retreat will be The One –
the one that sparks someone to voice a vulnerable truth, which then sparks more sharing, which then culminates to an anthem of brave voices and ideas.
At my most recent retreat, the question was: “If money were no object, what would you do with your life?”
One person raised her hand, sharing details so vivid we could all imagine this community center she yearned to build.
“I’d be the first to come,” someone volunteered, which was echoed by a chorus of agreement.
The brave contributor admitted that she’d forgotten about this dream… until now… until this room… until these people.
Spurred by her contribution, more people described their dreams, along with the obstacles, damaging beliefs, naysayers, and circumstances that had halted those dreams.
“Maybe it’s not too late,” a hopeful participant said into the microphone as teary-eyed witnesses nodded.
It wasn’t planned – more like divinely arranged – that my “dream companion” (Kelly) signed up for the retreat, traveling a long distance to be there.
I’d met Kelly virtually when she emailed me early on in my career as a writer. As an avid reader of my blog, she sensed that as my platform grew, so did my feelings of overwhelm. Kelly had editing skills that were going unused in her regular job and offered them to me.
After working together on a few small projects, I realized Kelly was the reason I could finally say yes to committing to a major writing endeavor that had weighed on my heart for several years.
Through what I called my “Index Card Exercise” during classroom visits, I’d gained valuable insight into the stressors facing teens. The kids themselves explained why suffering and apathy often resulted from the inability to know themselves, be themselves, and follow their passions.
Although I desperately wanted to share my discoveries, the research and editing required for this type of book seemed unsurmountable… until Kelly.
With Kelly’s support, the dream did just feel possible, it was possible. Live Love Now: Relieve the Pressure and Find Real Connection with Our Kids was published in April 2020, which marked the beginning of one of the most challenging periods in our lifetime. As I received messages of gratitude from weary parents, educators, and counselors using the book to support teens over the past few years, I always gave thanks for Kelly.
The retreat provided the opportunity to thank her in person.
During the last fifteen minutes of the workshop, I called Kelly up to the front of the room so I could properly introduce her to the group.
Kelly had been a quiet participant throughout the retreat; I often found myself drawn to her thoughtful, listening face. As she stood in front of the room, something shifted. Although Kelly did not know I was going to call her up, she stepped into her purpose, addressing the participants on a painful topic that had come up throughout the weekend for several of them.
Kelly was further along on that life-altering journey and had words of encouragement that only someone who’d been there could offer.
As Kelly returned to her seat, the excitement and energy in the room was palpable. People who did not know each other two days prior were now eager to accompany each other as they discovered (and rediscovered) the callings of their heart.
I was in awe…
What is it about uprooting ourselves from familiar territory that makes space for possibility?
What is it about feeling heard and held that makes hidden dreams safer to surface?
What is it about overcoming one obstacle that makes the others appear smaller?
What is it about envisioning someone else’s dream that makes us see our own?
****
In the days following the retreat, I couldn’t stop thinking about the vivid dreams that had been shared. Although I hadn’t voiced mine, I began wondering if it could be part of the anthem that members of this group now carried inside us.
I went to my kitchen junk drawer and pulled out a piece of paper I’d stuffed in there a few weeks back.
A reputable travel company had reached out to inquire if I would be interested in hosting my Soul Shift retreats in amazing locations across North America and beyond.
After a promising meeting with one of the representatives, I’d written down some of the destinations that looked captivating to me: Yosemite, Yellowstone, Colorado Rockies, Riviera Maya, Baja California Sur, Sante Fe and Taos, Bryce Canyon, British Columbia.
I was told that if there was enough interest from my online community through a short travel survey, my first destination retreat could be planned for 2024.
I went to the website and looked at some of the retreats and excursions planned and who was hosting them.
I saw descriptors like yoga instructor, professional photographer, foodie, outdoor adventurer, hiking guru… and more.
Hmmm… I though skeptically… who would want to go on an adventure with The Directionally Challenged Traveler?
That is when I’d shoved the paper in the drawer.
But in pulling it out again after the retreat and meeting Kelly, something clicked. In my research on supporting teens on their path to purpose for Live Love Now, I’d been drawn to the work of Patrick Cook-Deegan, founder of Project Wayfinder. His organization partners with educators to design innovative learning experiences outside the classroom walls that guide students to navigate life with purpose.
“Young people don’t usually develop a specific purpose and then go become an expert in that thing,” Cook-Deegan explains. “Rather, they are exposed to something new that helps them develop their own sense of purpose. In short, experiences lead to developing purpose, not the other way around.” (source)
Patrick’s reasoning explains why experiences that introduce young people to new ways of seeing the world (and themselves) are so valuable. Whether it’s a trip to a new place, spending time in the natural world, or working on something important to them in their community, experiences beyond one’s comfort zone can be hugely transformative.
Suddenly, it hit me! When writing that section of Live Love Now, I remember thinking, I wish there was a Project Wayfinder for adults!
Maybe this travel opportunity was it – and if I left it shoved in a drawer, I’d never know!
I quickly emailed the travel representative to see if I could still share the survey with my community.
“It’s not too late,” was the glorious response.
I shared the survey last week, and while the enthusiastic responses are still coming in, it appears that many members of our beloved community have been waiting for the opportunity to leave their comfort zones and explore new territories… BUT with the comfort of a trusted companion.
It appears that a “professional travel guide” is not needed for such an experience as much as a host who has learned to trust the guidance of her soul.
That’s me!
And perhaps in my willingness to step out in courage, you will step out with me… and together, we shall offer the fresh air long-lost dreams need to become an anthem of hope.
I can see us now, lifting our voices in and around canyons, campfires, and mountaintops.
It’s not too late.
If you haven’t done so already, I’d love your input on the two-minute travel survey! This will help me in knowing what destinations, itineraries, and budget ranges are most suitable for our group.
And if you don’t want to wait to gather in good company to connect, recharge, heal, and grow, please consider registering for my Soul Shift retreat happening April 19-21 at the beautiful Kripalu Center in the Berkshire Mountains. Because of the size of the meeting room, there are only 30 spots for this retreat, so please don’t hesitate to register if you are interested.
You can also register for my return visit to the Art of Living in Boone, NC, happening October 4-6, 2024. This will be my fourth time there and it is always the highlight of my year.
If you have ANY inkling to join me for either retreat, let’s do whatever we can to make it happen! Feel free to reach out to me with any questions and apprehensions.
My hand in yours
*All photos in this post taken by the amazing Amy Paulson during our time at the Soul Shift Retreat at the Art of Living Retreat Center