It’s been a while since my ADHD diagnosis. Though I’ve put lots of things in place to manage my symptoms and support my executive functions, it’s still so easy to lurch from day to day, ignoring the sneaky things that make living with ADHD needlessly difficult.
Recently, I had the bright idea to assess my life. I aimed to end up with a self-improvement plan comprised of high-impact (and relatively low-effort) actions I could take to better daily living with ADHD.
What I came up with was a process that I invite you to try for yourself to manage ADHD’s impact across all facets of your life. (Be sure to grab papers and a pen before you start.)
Step 1: Where are you struggling most right now?
Think:
What aspects of your life with ADHD are most annoying to you at the moment?
Where are your ADHD symptoms creating the most obstacles and hot spots in your life?
Where are you paying too high a price (finances, relationships, etc.)?
Another way to think of it: Are there any areas of your life that need more improvement and attention than other areas?
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Some areas you might think about:
Select three to six areas of focus at a time. I chose medication, food, motivation, and daily/weekly planning systems.
Step 2: Pen to paper.
Once you’ve narrowed down your areas, grab some sheets of paper. Each area of focus you selected in the prior step will get its own sheet of paper, which you’ll indicate at the top of each sheet. Then, fold each sheet in half width-wise.
Step 3: Get specific about trouble spots.
The top half of each sheet is where you’ll respond to the question: “What’s not working?” Vent a little but be sure to get specific. No matter the obstacle or inconvenience, write down anything that isn’t going your way and gives you a hard time in this area.
On my “food” sheet, for example, I wrote, “It drives me crazy to have to wrestle with myself whenever I need to eat. How can boiling cauliflower feel so impossible?!?” I also wrote about how overwhelming I found all aspects of eating, from thinking about what to eat and buy (ADHD decision fatigue is no joke) and putting it together to cleaning up after myself, all for a few bites. Trying to eat more vegetables was especially difficult; they took too long to wash, cut, and cook on the spot, so they were never ready when I wanted them.
[Read: 6 Secrets to Goal Setting with ADHD]
Note that this step isn’t about writing down what you think you “should” be doing. It’s a space for you to note what stands in the way of what you really want.
Step 4: What can make it better?
After you’ve written about everything that’s not working, turn your attention to the bottom half of the sheet. Here is where you’ll brainstorm: What can make life better? Get creative and use that ADHD superpower of idea generation! Let your ideas flow; think of how you can create different arrangements, tweak your existing systems, incorporate new objects/technology, and find other forms of support that – and this is important – work for you. (You’ll narrow down on a few actionable solutions in the next step.)
For my food troubles, I thought about how great it would be to always have prepared, ready-to-eat foods in my kitchen. An effortless grab-and-go for when I’m hungry and don’t want to think about prepping food, much less make an entire meal. I thought about how great it would be to never forget that I have vegetables in the fridge and to have prep work on said veggies completed well in advance.
How could I make this happen? This is some of what I wrote down:
To reduce decision fatigue, I can come up with three easy meals as staple options. This will make grocery shopping so much easier, too, since the ingredients for those chosen meals will always be on my shopping list.
I’m a visual person. Why don’t I hang up photos of my favorite meals on my fridge to help me remember them?
I seem to remember to eat veggies when I can clearly see them, not when they’re hidden in the back of the fridge or in a drawer. I’m also more inclined to eat veggies when all the prep work is done. Maybe I can prep veggies when I have time, like on weekends, and put them in clear containers.
Step 5: Mold your ideas into an action list.
From your solutions, circle up to three ideas that seem worth trying. Now, activate the ADHD gift of problem-solving, and think of how to put each of your chosen solutions into action.
What will prompt you to put the solution in motion? Involving other people? Gamifying it? Connecting it with your interests? Think of the conditions and factors that tend to facilitate action for you. You may find it helpful to think about the areas of your life where things are going smoothly. What’s working in those areas, and how can you translate those elements to these problem areas?
How can you get around potential snags? Do you need checklist to help you remember the steps? Reminders on your phone? On your calendar?
Write down your action list for each area of focus on a fresh sheet of paper. As you think of and draft each action step, keep the following in mind:
Make your action steps realistic. Aim for the biggest wins you can achieve with the least amount of effort. (That win you consider small is actually a big win if you can do it completely and consistently!)
Craft clear action steps. Note what you’ll do, how long it will take, and what “finished” looks like.
My action list looked a little like this:
After dinner today, I will spend one hour creating a poster of my three favorite meals in Canva.
On Saturday, before I head to the supermarket, I will spend 20 minutes writing all items I need to prepare my favorite meals on my phone. I will then pin the note for easy reference.
On Sunday mornings, I will dedicate one hour to preparing veggies. I will set a recurring reminder on my phone to put the prepared veggies in clear containers and store them in the fridge.
Step 6: Do the actions!
…or do what you can. Because, if you’re anything like me, you’ll rush through half your action list, trudge through the next few items, and then grind to a halt before finishing all your action steps. And to that I say: Magnificent! That’s way more than you would have done without the review. But if you find yourself making no progress at all, consider making your action steps smaller. Either way, resist perfectionism. A small step can be plenty in improving quality of life.
Put your action list somewhere you’ll easily see it. Think positive as you carry out your action steps. Visualize how much easier your life will be — and how much energy you’ll have to do things that really matter to you — once you take these steps. Aim to revisit your self-improvement plan once or twice a year.
Manage Adult ADHD: Next Steps
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